So I decided that I would treat this attempt to get back on track as something I am doing for the first time. So I'm not the Jen who was once morbidly obese and lost a lot - I am someone who has been a reasonable weight and has gained a whole bunch over the last year and needs to get some of the poundage off.
That means I am starting from scratch. I have bad habits I need to unlearn and there are healthy skills I need to learn.
Only 2 days in I am seeing where some of my challenges lie. Like coming home from work and picking and picking and picking just because it's there. Or exercising really well and feeling that this entitles me to consume massive amounts.
Feeling hungry 30 minutes before dinner is normal. It’s not snack time. DUH!
But what thinking of this as a new thing is helping me do what I did in the first place - make small deliberate changes. This is in contrast to what I've been doing all winter - which is obsessively exercising and severely calorie restricting until I go batshit crazy and eat everything that isn't nailed down.
I also can’t be delusional and think that 1 week perfectly on plan will drop 20 pounds. It doesn’t work like that. Patience – oh yippee something that’s I’m sooooo good at – NOT!!!!
So yeah this is only day 2 and there's a long fucking way to go. But I remind myself that I practiced being "good" more days then not in the beginning instead of thinking I had 200 pounds to lose and it worked pretty well.
Round 2 continues...